


An Idiots Guide to Interpersonal Relationships.

by Wishunew



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Friendship, Implied Crush, M/M, Pre-Slash, Sad lance, ptsd mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-28
Updated: 2016-09-28
Packaged: 2018-08-18 09:25:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8157218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wishunew/pseuds/Wishunew
Summary: Life is complicated, no one ever makes all the right choices for all the good reasons. Lance usually just gets by on luck. He's running out.





	

Being in space away from everything he knows and everyone, almost everyone, he loves, is a trial Lance honestly had not anticipated when he decided to get into the cockpit of the giant blue lion. How long ago was it, weeks? Months? Without the sun it was hard to tell time, to know when day was night and when night was day. Millions of lightyears away from his family, did they know what happened? Do they think he’s okay? Or is the Garrison going to lie to them, like they did to everyone about the Kerberos mission? Not that Galaxy Garrison could have known about the Galra, about what really happened, but they already have such convenient lies planned for when they need them, Lance wouldn't put it past them to make something up now.

It wasn't all bad, it wasn't even mostly bad if you ignored that they’re fighting for their lives and the freedom of the entire universe most days. Lance counts himself lucky even still because he has Hunk, his brother from another mother, the voice of reason he’s been ignoring for years, the man he would absolutely be lost without. Hunk has always grounded him whenever Lance felt like he couldn't keep his head above the water. Lance was lucky to have him, and now the team had him, which was great because not everyone left earth on this spontaneous life or death quest to save the galaxy with all their bags packed and their best friend on board. And hunk was like, the universal best friend. Lance didn't mind sharing but when Hunk was away with Pidge or Keith or Coran, Lance was lonely. And worse that lonely, he was bored. A bored Lance is a Lance that gets into trouble on earth, and apparently the same rules apply to space. 

His choice of trouble for the day was currently staring down the Gladiator robot on the training deck. From the observation room where Lance had wandered in hopes of crashing Keith's ‘battle of one’, he couldn't tell what setting the robot was on, but it just stood there. Impressive and immobile as Shiro, codename Trouble, just looked at it. Despite evidence to the contrary, Lance wasn't as much of an idiot as he let everyone believe. He knew Shiro had a problem with Robots, sure the older boy was getting better with them, but unless Shiro had someone else to worry about while facing them, someone to protect, he still got tense with panic seven out of ten times. It made sense why he was doing this, the Galra used droids as much as they used real live soldiers, but it… There was a strange feeling, in Lance's gut a deep pain, that Shiro thought he needed to do this alone.

The Blue lion Paladin stood in the observation room and watched as Voltrons leader stared down the robot for what felt like a lifetime. Lance isn't sure if lifetimes are different in space. He feels like he’s lived two already. Maybe he’s starting a third now?

“You don't have to face them alone anymore, Shiro” He said over the com, trying to sound like Hunk does when he’s reassuring Lance over whatever it is he needs to be assured of. 

Shiro jumped a mile at the sound of his voice, hand glowing pink as he whipped his head around, trying to locate whatever had startled him out of wherever he’d been in his head. Lance hissed at himself through his teeth, obviously Shiro hadn't been expecting anyone to be interrupting his private psychological warfare session. 

“Sorry, it's just me.” the younger man added when he realized he probably should have introduced himself better, “i should have told you i was up here.”

Shiro shuts down his weaponized arm and begins the process of pretending he’s okay, plastering a smile on his face over the previous expression of panic he had been wearing. It was like someone putting fresh new wallpaper over broken drywall, it hid the damage but it wasn't right. It didn't seem fair, that Shiro felt like he had to hide his problems deep down, handle them by himself. None of the rest of them hid their issues. Lance’s usually came out in explosive yelling matches with Keith, which was a little more cathartic than he’d like to admit, but it was fine. 

“It’s alright” Shiro called up, human hand rubbing at the limp mechanical one, he’s going to be mad at himself for activating it at lance’s voice, “did you want to use the room?” 

The surprise in his voice was genuine. Honestly Lance is surprised he’s here too, he doesn't train unless he has too. 

But Lance isn't thinking about that when he hits the button to slide the main window down in the observation deck, or when he sets up a nice little spot for him to sit against it. 

“Let's do this together?” he asks before he loses his nerve, settling into the sniper's nest and summoning his bayard before Shiro has a chance to respond. It was fine there, an easy statement, a team building moment nothing more. Nothing to think too hard on, but he continued because why wouldn't he keep talking, he’s Lance. 

“We should practice in pairs, too. The Point of a team is that you never have to be alone again, right?” at the moment it didn't feel like Lance had said anything heavy, it didn't feel like he’d set anything in particular into motion. He just gave Shiro one of his “i got this” grins. Shiro eyed him long enough for his face to become uncomfortable, before he nodded and called for the gladiator program to run. 

It was probably cheating to be up this high against a ground based opponent and Keith probably would have blown a blood vessel making sure Lance knew it, but he was a ranged fighter. From insults to arrows to whatever his rifle was shooting, magic space bullets? He prefered to be farther away and at a better vantage point. With Two of them and Lance at his advantageous position, they should probably be going against harder settings or multiple droids. But whatever Lance had started when he’d volunteered to stay, this was still Shiro’s show. Whatever he’d walked in on still sat in Lance’s brain, so he settled himself in as support. Which sucked like a thousand times harder than a black hole, because he didn't get the satisfactory little chiming noise he’d begged Hunk to put in whenever he downed an opponent. Instead he shot at arms and legs, anything to keep the gladiator bot off balance so Shiro could move in and hit it. To ignore the deep tones ‘failure noise’ Hunk had also programed in just to annoy Lance specifically, he made a game of it, trying to see if he could hit specific parts of the robot every time. It wasn't easy, but it was fun. Especially when he caught glimpses of Shiro moving around the robot, like some kind of offspring of lightning and water, fluid and fast. It was so distracting that lance accidently missed his target and shot the robot's head clean off. 

That seemed to startled Shiro, who had been going in for a kill strike. He pulled it as the robot fell backwards and digitized, panting and blinking up at lance like he was seeing him for the first time.

“Sorry?” the blue paladin called out sheepishly as he sank a little bit in his nest. The older boy let out a soft chuckle as he wiped the sweat from his forehead and ran a hand through his hair. Lance swallowed as he tried to pull his eyes away from the way his arm muscles moved under the skin tight bodysuit Shiro was always wearing. 

“That was a good shot, don't be sorry” the leader called up to him. His smile was real, warm and proud and Lance’s stomach feels like an Ocean, “we should probably stop for now anyway, get a shower in before dinner. Or, i should, since you've been sitting the entire time”

Lance let out the token protest Shiro had to have been expecting at the comment. 

“I think Keith is rubbing off on you” the blue paladin grumbled. But there was that thing with Time, again. It had barely been lunch time when he’d wandered in here, and now it was dinner? Lance liked to eat, and now Space was making him miss meals. Space or Shiro. Why hadn't he noticed he’d missed a meal. Had Shiro skipped lunch too? He’d been here longer than Lance had.

“Hey, Lance?’ Shiro’s voice was soft despite the volume, and something in the Lance melted like chocolate. The older boy wasn't looking at him, once again contemplating his artificial limb, before turning and looking at Lance, really looking at him. “Thank you” 

His look was… soft but scorching, inquisitive and also young in a way Lance had not previously associated with their Leader. It made everything in the blue paladin’s head turn to mush.

“D-don't mention it?” Lance almost asked because what was his name again? What were they talking about? Something about food and the way Shiro smiles, “Um… see you at dinner.” he didn't flee but sitting still until Shiro left didn't feel much different.

Their shared time had rapidly become a thing, he didn't know what type of thing, between the two of them that Lance had not anticipated. Shiro actually started seeking him out for their super special silent training sessions on the deck. The always started out with the same weird, zen-like staredown between Shiro and the Gladiator Bot. Sometimes it was just for a few minutes. Sometimes Lance fell asleep counting Shiro’s breaths. It was a Private Thing; lance didn't need to know why Shiro felt like he needed to do that, and he didn't ask. He just set himself up in his sniper's perch and waited for the signal. They started with a few warm up rounds on the easier settings but Shiro, like Keith. Always insisted on trying harder and Harder settings, ‘to push ourselves.’ Unlike Keith Shiro had stylish hair and he waited for more than one victory before counting it as level mastered.

It was a lot harder to keep four or five robots off Shiro, to be able to read the Older boy at a distance to tell which robot he was going for, which one he couldn't see. Where to hit the gladiator as to unbalance it in just the right way, so Shiro didn't have to waste a move lining up for the kill strike. He’s only failed a handful of times but he’s getting better as they work. Lance’s aim is damn near perfect and Shiro doesn't look nearly as panicked as he used to when the blue paladin misses his shot and He’s faced with a completely functional on balance gladiator. This was honestly some of Lance’s best work and as much as he wanted to rub it in Keith's face or show off to Hunk, he never wanted to share these moments with anyone else but Shiro. 

This whatever it was, male bonding thing, was a… thing for a couple of weeks before anyone noticed, or before Lance noticed anyone noticed, and decided to comment. There was a garden planet nearby where the Castle was hiding while Coran worked on integrating Pidge’s cloaking technology into the whole ship. Hunk and Pidge wanted to investigate. It scanned as safe enough, no signs of the galra, or any space faring races, and it was the perfect opportunity to gather samples for “Hunk and Keith’s Friendship (but you guys can totally plant stuff too if you want) Garden” And they wanted Lance to come with them, like some kind of impromptu garrison trio reunion. 

“Oh man” lance said, honestly trying to sound sincere even though he had zero desire to go through re-entry sickness for some plants they might not even be able to eat, “I would love to but i got a thing with shiro… soonish. And i can't miss that.”

“Oh come on, Please?” Hunk whines, falling to his knees before Lance with tears in his eyes. Lance had known that that one year of Drama club he’d encouraged Hunk to do would come back to haunt him, he had just known it. “How bad can you be at shooting that Shiro has to drive you like a work horse.”

“I'm not a horse!” Lance says without thinking. It was easy to slip into the familiar dramatic energy of his friends. He stood up suddenly and proud, chest out, hands on his hips, “I’ll have you know i'm an excellent shot. The best!”

“Shiro’s score goes up three times faster than yours, lance.” Keith said dryly, walking in at the end of Lance’s declaration. He wasn't even in this conversation, lance thought dryly, shooting him a sour look as he wheeled to face the red lion paladin. The mullet man had his hands on his hips, his patented “I’m about to school you so hard but i have the emotional memory of a teaspoon so i'm already over this” stance.

“I looked up the videos of your sessions. Your shots are sloppy and you’re too far away. You need all the practice you can get, and then some. You should train with Pidge and I, not just Shiro” Lance squinted hard at him. Was he trying to be helpful or rude?

“Maybe you need glasses” Pidge piped up, seriously unhelpfully, “you shoot fine when you’re on the ground but it's smart that you’re shooting from far away. Rifles aren't made for close quarters after all. Maybe Coran can recalibrate the medical bay to check your eyes? I’m sure i can develop an algorithm based on Hunk’s or Keith's eyesight, you’re both 20/20 right? Maybe the castle could make glasses for you”

Lance was left stunned silent and stuttering, trying to form words for how wrong they all were while Hunk hung from one of his arms and begged Lance to come with them to the garden world. “My aim is fine” he finally managed to grit out, spitting the words harshly at keith, “and there’s nothing wrong with my eyesight okay. There’s nothing about me that isn't perfect!”

“Exactly!” Hunk crowed with joy, “and that means you can skip practice just this once and come with us to explore a whole new planet. This is only like the 16th time we’ve done it, it’ll be so much fun” he wasn't putting any of his real strength into trying to get Lance to the pod bay, but he’d still managed to move the Blue Paladin halfway across the room. Lance was weak to Hunk. 

“Sorry team” Shiro’s voice crackled over the intercom system just as the scramble alarms started to blare, “Shore leave’s been canceled, two galra warships spotted on the other side of the planet.”

“We don't know if they’re here for us or it's just a coincidence and they’re here for another reason” Allura’s battle ready voice always made multiple parts of Lance sit up and pay attention while simultaneously making him and all his bits want to hide behind the biggest most solid thing in the room and pray she finds something else to destroy. “But we’re here, we’re Voltron, and we owe it to this Planet to protect them” 

Lance isn't trying to say that Since he and Shiro had started bonding that it's easier to form voltron, but ever since he and Shiro had started bonding in the training room it's easier to form voltron, and he’ll take complete credit for that. Pay no attention to the friendship garden behind the curtains. They were out of the castle and already in the form of a giant warbot when their scanners picked up two more warships inside the planet's atmosphere. Their quick and easy space skirmish just got a whole lot messier. atmo means drones and lion to ship to planet damage, possibly even a ground battle and no one likes those. Except for maybe the galra. And mole people. The Red and Green ran hot with fury that they had missed those two ships, pulsed with a need to seperate, give chase, protect. No, blue and yellow railed in unison trying to hold the form while dodging railgun blasts. Struggling against each others most basic natures, Voltron was weak when they couldn't find an instinct to trust until, Shiro's sheer force of iron will pulled them together.

“One fight at a time” he ordered, sharp and clear and never disappointed at their discourse, “focus on the fight here, in front of us. If we fail here there will be no help for the planet down there. They’re trying to split us up” It's an obvious tactic, so clear once he’s said it. In Harmony once more they destroyed the warships Pidge believed were decoys sent to lure them out.

“Now we separate” Shiro barks his command as Voltron sheds its humanoid shell to become the five lions once more, “stay together, Hunk, keith, you take the ship that went right, Lance and I will take the left. Pidge, coordinate with the castle, try to see why the Galra are here and protect any native populations you find”

Lance swallowed the nervous sound he’d almost made at the order, swallowed the giddy feeling of Shiro wanting him at his back, and followed the black lion down through the atmosphere breathing though the turbulence of entry. He could practically feel the other paladins willing him to be better than they think he is in training. Lance just hopes he can be as good as he is in training. Live combat is miles away from theoretical injuries received from the Gladiator robot. 

“Lance” Shiro’s voice was everything Lance needed it to be right now, rich and soothing and steady. He’s on a private channel, there’s a distinct lack of hunk’s self pep talking, “We’re a team remember? No one’s alone. Everyone is going to be fine”

Lance flushed and swallowed hard, “I… yeah. W-we got this” He said as they dived, probably more to himself than Shiro. Over the open coms he heard hunk and Keith, the red lion had caught its prey some miles above the ground and disabled it. Typical keith, all He and Hunk had to do now was destroy it and survive the drones before it fixed itself. Easy. 

The blue and the black lions weren't as fast, and thus not as lucky. It took almost all of Lance’s focus and skill as a Paladin to keep Blue in sentry mode, destroying the flying drone fighters while he slid from cover to cover laying down fire for Shiro, whose connection to black was still so effortless and deeper by comparison. Luckily, being gun support to shiro was almost second nature. And with the total denial of a decent shot from a tenacious galra soldier that clipped Lance because two things at once is hard in a war zone, three is impossible, they both were still alive and fighting by the time Keith and Hunk arrived to finish routing the Galra forces. 

“Take that ‘You need glasses’, In your face ‘You need more training’” Lance practically sang as he did a little victory dance, cut short by the screaming pain in his side as the adrenaline in his system faded. He barely kept himself from doubling over, wrapping an arm around himself to put pressure on the pain. How was he even standing? Oh. 

Shiro had been quick to reach him, Hunk and Keith were still getting out of their Lions, supporting Lance’s weight with almost comical ease, “Good job guys! Any word from Pidge?”

“All clear” the green paladin chirped at almost the exact same moment, “the Local natives have all taken refuge inside their sacred city mountain thing. Do you need Voltron or can i help Coran put their language into our translator program?” Hunk looked up woefully at his lion and let out a noise that said he was disappointed he didn't get to stay behind and help with the new coding for the program as Shiro sighed with relief, his team was safe once again. Mostly safe.

“Diplomacy is important so we need that program working with their language ASAP, we’re all clear here anyway, Just have to patch lance up” shiro said as he started trying to see where exactly Lance was hurt. His armor was askew and he couldn't find a wound that matched any of the burn marks, “We’ll rendezvous at your coordinates when we’re done”

“Copy” Pidge says with glee in her voice, unbridled excitement at the challenge of modding their translator to adapt new alien languages. Hunk kicked at a rock on the ground in jealous defeat. 

“I’m fine” Lance groans immediately after Shiro disconnects with the green paladin, “it's just some burns, i swear on my honor as the best shot in voltron.”

“You sound delirius” keith remarks dryly, arms crossed over his chest. Shiro looks down at Lance with a soft frown on his face like he’s done something sad and wrong at the same time.

“I’m Fine” Lance insists, harder this time, pushing himself away from Shiro to stand, wobbly by himself, “look, see? Perfectly fine” He was not fine. He could feel the blood from the wound on his side dripping down his skin under his armor. He’s just got to get out of there before he does anything embarrassing like faint. 

“Lance” Shiro's voice was odd, too worried to be scolding him but it also had that distinct ‘Im disappointed in you’ tone that he seemed to save specifically for when Lance was flirting with people. He took a step closer to the blue paladin, ready to hold him up again, but Lance backpedaled, side stepping his way around the hulking mass of perfection and concern.

“I swear to quiznak i'm okay” he said as he painted a shit-eating grin on his face, making his dodge an intricate move just to get to hunk. Making his way to the bigger man with legs like a baby deer, and throwing his arms around his best friend in a dramatic hug. 

“I am 100% not okay” Lance whispered quietly so that only Hunk could here, “help me to my lion before they figure it out”

“Dude they already have it figured out” the yellow lion paladin whispers back even as he makes a jovial show of wrapping his arms around the smaller paladin, trying not to make it obvious that he’s supporting lance’s weight as they walk into the blue lion and out of eyesight of the other two paladins. 

Lance stops pretending when Shiro and Keith can't see him and all but collapses into his pilot's chair, breathing heavy as he presses his hand against his side, swaying a little as he goes pale. 

“Lance, man, maybe you should let me look at that? I’m not like the best at field dressing wounds but we can't just let you bleed until you can get to coran. You could be seriously hurt” the bigger man hovered around his friend in frustrated uselessness, not wanting to pull at him too hard in case he’s seriously hurt, not wanting to be pushy for nothing if it isn't. Though everything is pointing to is. His eyes darted around the lions cockpit trying to find the first aid kits he made everyone, the same kit lance forgets to restock and put back. 

“We’re going to be fine” lance said with as much conviction as his shock filled body would let him, “especially if you leave so i can fly blue back to the castle and hope Coran will throw my ass in a healing pod” He could feel hunk hesitating, wanting to say something, but the longer he stalls the more lance bleeds. 

“You don't have to prove anything lance.” Hunk said finally, as he left, “not to them, especially not to me. No one’s mad because you’re hurt” he let that hang in the air as he left, the soft sound of Blues door closing behind him the only harmony to his loaded words. 

“I’m mad at me” Lance said to no one as blue roared to life, taking off towards the castle. Blue could feel it, too, his anger. Tried to sooth it with a purr and a share of power, she wanted to settle him, leech his pain, slow the bleeding now that she surrounded him. Lance doesn't know his body well enough when it's connected to her to know if she’s helping or not, but he does know their mind.

“It's my job to watch out for them” he says defensively, like the lion was asking for an explanation, “to watch their backs. Shiro can't have screw ups at his back. If he goes down he needs to know he’s got someone that can keep the galra off him. Not someone who can't even stay in cover long enough not to get shot.” 

The fierce rumble all around him from his lion says he’s wrong. Wounds, scars are a part of life. The pride will always be there when he falls. And just in case he didn't get what she was implying, the blue lion slid through his head, forcing him to recall all the good shots he took, the times he did dodge, and even how after he took the hit to his side he fought. Laid down enough cover fire to keep Shiro in close quarters combat til the cavalry arrived. Lance was getting short of breath due to blood loss but he still had enough in him to sigh dramatically. 

“You know, brief moments of self depreciation make a man deep and interesting” he muttered as Blue touched down outside of a large cave where the green Lion stood ready, “hey you were supposed to bring me to the Castle. Pass out then pod, remember the plan?” Lance whined, letting himself slump forward in a brief moment of weakness. Blue was adamant that they should be here.

He sighed and heaved himself up, keeping one arm pressed to his still throbbing side as he fought off the white spots and dim edges of his vision, woozily making his way out of the lion. That was his plan anyway, he’d gotten maybe halfway down the ramp before his head felt like it was floating away from his body like a helium balloon, his legs giving out without guidance. Blood rushed through his ears, someone called out his name sharply, all he could think about was what had he done now, before everything went dark. 

\-----

The healing pods were cold on the inside, like a real doctor's office, and lance had been in them enough to know that, even coming out of unconsciousness. Which is how he knew he wasn't in one right now. Someone was holding him, and he was hot, too hot, like he'd gotten drunk and fell into a hot tub with all his clothes on again. The heat made it hard for him to claw himself into reality through his sleeping brain.

“‘S going on?” he slurred sleepily, trying to move away from whoever was holding him because gross he’s in some kind of hot tub with his armor on, Allura is never going to forgive him. Even as he squirmed the arm around him held fast, the person who was holding him was strong. Strong and made of metal. “Shiro? What happened?”

“You’re an idiot, is what happened” The older teen grumbled against his hair, pulling lance closer to him, squeezing a little tighter, “you should have told me how bad it was. You should have let me help you” 

“I was fine” Lance said feeling like a broken record as he wakes up more, becoming more alert, “I had a plan, it was all under control.”

Shiro snorts, “Hunk told me about your plan” He didn't sound happy, wouldn't let go of Lance. Which would normally make all of lance red and throbbing for attention, but he was practically crushing him to his chest with the strength of his arms, “Hope Coran gets you to a healing pod, i think the jist of it was? You’re not usually this stupid, despite what you’ll let everyone believe.”

The water was thick around them, heavy and glowing soft blue in the dark cave. Coupled with Shiro's proximity, Lance's’ life was becoming harder to deal with in more ways than one. “Blame it on the blood loss? Speaking of stupidity, why are we in a glow in the dark magic hot tub while i'm bleeding out?”

 

Lance was pressed so tightly to shiro he could feel him sigh before, in an incredible display of hunk like strength, Shiro heaves Lance out of the pool and onto the warm stone floor next to it. “Because its magic” Shiro said dryly, as he hefted himself out and crawled over lance's lap, straddling his legs, “the water has quintessence or something like it in it. I’m going to take your shirt off, okay?”

The blue paladin swallowed hard and nodded, going red to his ears. Shiro looked beautiful on a bad day, but soaking wet and awashed with the blue glow of the water he looks practically angelic. Lance’s silence seemed to worry Shiro, making him frown down at the younger man, hands holding on to the edges of Lance’s ruined under armor, “Are you sure it's okay? I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable” 

“You can make me feel whatever you want” Lance says, because he’s lance and he’s out of his depth and he flirts when he doesn't know what else to say. Above him Shiro goes a little ridged, an adorable dusting of red blooms over his nose and Lance feels himself blushing brighter in return. He’s not reading into it, it's just a reaction to their environment. It's hot in this cave. “I mean, do whatever you want to me. No, shit. Yeah, you can take my shirt off”

Shiro chuckles lightly, choosing to be the bigger man and ignore Lance’s fumbling as he gently peels Lance from his shirt. Careful of lance’s side and the various other burns he’d had but can't feel anymore. Maybe the bath was made of painkillers and he's numb? Except he remembers how hot they were. And he jumps when Shiro’s hand touches his, metal hand hotter than normal skin as he presses against where the worst of his injury was and… all Lance can feel is the almost overwhelming heat from the too large too warm palm on his bare and unblemished side.

“H-healing pools?” Lance asked, hating the stutter. But Shiro was laser focused on his side, his skin holy god, running his hands, both of them over everywhere Lance had been hurt like he needs to feel it for himself.

“These pools are sacred to the inhabitants in this area. We were allowed to bring you here because we’re heroes” Shiro explained calmly like he wasn't feeling up Lance’s chest, “the others are in their own pools, I volunteered to stay with you.”

“If you wanted to get me naked, you shouldn't have waited until i was unconscious from blood loss, Shiro. What will the other girls say?” 

The black paladin shot Lance a look of reproach as he climbed off the younger man, sitting down on the edge of the hot spring, legs dangling into the water and back facing the blue paladin, “You can't be this reckless again Lance, you have to tell us when you’re hurt. You stumbled out of your lion and fell and… and I” Shiro trailed off, human hand white knuckled on the smooth stone lip of the tub, “I thought…”

Lance’s stomach dropped out as he sat up so fast his head spun due to the hot air in the cave. “Whoa, hey, Shiro, I’m okay, really. You felt so yourself, all in one piece. I was just being a jerk, i swear I’m fine, I won't do it again.”

“M-maybe if I had been more careful you…” Shiro whispered, small and broken and wrong. Lance was the biggest jerk in the universe, how could he not have thought about how Shiro would take this. “I can't lose anyone else.”

The self conscious, defeated hunch to Shiro’s back mande Lance wish he could take it all back, every moment. He’d slump into shiro's big arms back on the battlefield and tell him everything, made him want to beat himself with a brick. Channeling his big brother instincts, lance tugged Shiro’s grip lose of the rocks and pulled him into a hug. The angle was awkward and it's hard to cradle someone who had so much more mass on them than you, but Lance made it work. Tucked Shiro’s head under his chin and held him tight like when his younger sibling used to come to him when she had nightmares. 

“You can hear me breathing, right? I’m alive, Shiro. I’m right here. Everyone is fine, everyone is safe. It's okay” he scratched his nails gently thought the older teens short hair and hummed the song his grandmother used to sing to him. Shiro was a big man and it’s going to take all the McClain in Lance to help him. “I’m a big brother, Shiro. We tend to keep secrets so no one else has to worry. It's a hard habit to break” 

The black paladins response was muffled and small but it echoed through Lances ribcage and around his heart as the older man gripped desperately at his bare back, “You should have told me how bad it was. I’m the leader, you should have told me.”

Lance crooned softly, trying to think of what his mother would do since the big brother powers didn't seem to work, still running his hands though shiro’s hair. 

“I didn't want you to think I couldn't do it” He said finally.”it's stupid and I know it, but i wanted you to think I was as good as you needed me to be. To trust that I had your back. To trust me.” 

The blue paladin wasn't strong enough to keep his hold on the older boy when Shiro shot away from him like lance’s chest was on fire. His hands grabbed the younger man's shoulders hard, shaking him roughly like he was a disobedient dog. 

“Of course I trust you!” Shiro all but shouted, his eyes dark and wet and angry, “We’re a team. More than that, you… you’ve been there for me. When I…” He trailed off with an angry little huff and turned away, staring hard into the glowing water as he wiped his eyes, hand falling down to grip the stone hard again. 

Lance sighed, cautiously sliding his hand down to cover Shiro’s, to coax him to let go of the stone once more, twining their fingers together. 

“Occasionally” he says in a tone that was meant to lighten the mood, “I am just as stupid as I appear” The older man snorted softly and shook his head, but didn't move to let go of his Lance’s hand, So he’ll call that a win.

**Author's Note:**

> So this turned out way cuter and more pg than I had ever intended. So if I have time there will probably be a rated sequal to this because thats how i usually role. i mean seriously i have no excuse for this orz. please brush your teeth after reading


End file.
